Scrap quiet carriages & replace with 70's disco

OK, back to the blog and my first big whinge of the year, (after snow, gritters, train cancellations etc).

The middle class already lose two carriages to the upper class and employees of companies with frivolous expense policies. Oh and MP's of course. But what really gets on my wick are 'quiet' carriages. Aren't most pretty quiet anyway, and who are these stuffy sods that can't handle someone receiving a call - get a life, or better some ear plugs!

To confound matters, the quiet carriage is usually at the front of the train, then 1st class. So if I walk to the front (which is closest to the exit), I have to walk back two carriages if I want to listen to some music, not loudly, and certainly not so others can hear.

It's a weirdly British thing, the right of silence, the right not to have to talk to your neighbour, the right to live in your own bubble. I'm sure if those misery guts who use them had their way, the quiet carriage would become the clinically clean carriage with private sound proof booths and air locks between them.

My solution is simple, scrap the stupid quiet carriage and give these old farts iPods. They can be educated in modern music, (not using my playlist) and still not have to talk to any 'commoners' or hear any mobile phone calls.

And if there is someone who has their music at an annoying level how about this for a novel idea. Tap them on the shoulder, "excuse me" (note - do NOT call them 'young man/ lady' as this is certain to result in an increase of volume), "do you mind turning your music down a notch". Most probably didn't realise how loud it was and would embarrassingly agree.

I think the rail companies should go further. They should turn the quiet carriages into noisy ones. A place for the chatty, drunk, flirty and loud. A place you can strike up a conversation without people thinking you are a nut case. They should create 'Train FM' where you can listen to news, views and music to take your mind off the overcrowding. Buskers could get slots during off peak. Yes that's it, entertainment carriages! Karaoke carriages. Bring back bars on trains. Rip out the seats and have everyone dancing to 70's under a glitter ball - imagine how many more people you could get in a carriage! How about bar quiz's, sukoko tournaments, tenpin bowling carriage - no that's silly.

Right, enough brilliant ideas. I'm going to spend the remainder of my journey being silent looking at other silent people. Shhhhhhhh!